Bringing it all Together
While I've been busy getting my blog all gussied up, (working buttons and now a signature - yea!) we've been reformulating our budget to accept the truth we've discovered. Which is this:
When Brian got his raise last July, we grossed $200 more each month. I've been feeling like I'm going crazy because it hasn't seemed like we had any more money each month. It's felt like less. When Brian looked closer at his checks, he found out more taxes were taken out, so we only net an extra sixty dollars. Hmm...and we've been paying more in bills between our increased property taxes and electricity - to the tune of $270. Honestly, I don't know how we would've done the last six months if we hadn't gained perspective from our first No Spend month. Our new budget approach showed us how to be aware of what we had to spend and not spend more. It even allowed us to save a bit in anticipation of a trip to Colorado and Christmas.
So looking back, and looking forward, I feel loved. We did something brave and scary (our first No Spend month) and had no idea how much we needed it or that it was in the nick of time. The months that followed could've been panicked ones, but after No Spending, I knew we were capable of spending less if we needed to. My soul's swollen with gratitude. Money worries robbed my joy, and still do sometimes, but it's WAY better.
This clear hindsight isn't typical for me. When people talk about how God's led them, I've felt left out. It sounds so black and white when they tell it, but I've got this mish-mash of gray. So I'm basking in my moment of clarity. It helps me believe in this path I'm following - helps me buy into God's curriculum for me. I say curriculum because I read one book and then another, thinking it random, but the ideas of each leads into the next and then I start yoga, which jives with what I'm learning too. I get the feeling someone's doing lesson plans. Which means I'm too important to leave to chance, too wonderful. Which means you are too. And to think the No Spend month was the whole reason I started talking to you...I think my soul might just burst.
I'm so excited for us on our paths, with our careful planner just beyond where we can see. If you can't see a darn thing from where you are - the cohesion, the method - don't worry. Seems it's just a timing thing. Someday, I'll think I've fallen off the planet and you'll tell me your path makes sense, so mine must too. We'll walk together this way, I hope, until darkness goes away and we'll feel the love every single minute. Forever and ever. Thanks for the walking and the sharing. You mean so much to me.
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| Chandler showing me how one simply enjoys the ride |
So looking back, and looking forward, I feel loved. We did something brave and scary (our first No Spend month) and had no idea how much we needed it or that it was in the nick of time. The months that followed could've been panicked ones, but after No Spending, I knew we were capable of spending less if we needed to. My soul's swollen with gratitude. Money worries robbed my joy, and still do sometimes, but it's WAY better.
This clear hindsight isn't typical for me. When people talk about how God's led them, I've felt left out. It sounds so black and white when they tell it, but I've got this mish-mash of gray. So I'm basking in my moment of clarity. It helps me believe in this path I'm following - helps me buy into God's curriculum for me. I say curriculum because I read one book and then another, thinking it random, but the ideas of each leads into the next and then I start yoga, which jives with what I'm learning too. I get the feeling someone's doing lesson plans. Which means I'm too important to leave to chance, too wonderful. Which means you are too. And to think the No Spend month was the whole reason I started talking to you...I think my soul might just burst.
I'm so excited for us on our paths, with our careful planner just beyond where we can see. If you can't see a darn thing from where you are - the cohesion, the method - don't worry. Seems it's just a timing thing. Someday, I'll think I've fallen off the planet and you'll tell me your path makes sense, so mine must too. We'll walk together this way, I hope, until darkness goes away and we'll feel the love every single minute. Forever and ever. Thanks for the walking and the sharing. You mean so much to me.
Your insights really touched me. God is definitely a "just-in-time" God, which allows us to see His handiwork all the better. Makes me smile too, just thinking of how He leads us, even when we're not aware at the time.
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you smiled...makes me feel like we're smiling together and that's pretty great. :)
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