Day 22: Hitting the Wall

Yesterday's Totals:

Total spent: 10.91 - pizza
Fun money total: -1.67

Before I begin tonight, I'd like to say everything I've said up to this point has been true. I say this because I feel so differently tonight you may begin to wonder. I'm feeling frustrated, on many fronts. I'm sick of hundred-degree heat. I'm sick of eating something up and having to add it to a grocery list we can't buy all of with a day or two's money. I'm sick of the kids struggling against me. I'm sick of the gas light. I'm sick of my white cat shedding and keeping my dark wood floors obviously dirty. I'm sick of driving Brian's car. I'm sick of being 2.5 lbs heavier than usual and not knowing why. I'm sick of waking up to the mess that happens when I let things go for a while. 

You remember I said I was letting the sweeping go while I read? Well, I finished the books and was looking around today. It's not just the floors. I found piles everywhere I'd been ignoring. This is why I have such a hard time letting it go! I feel I pay for it in the end. It didn't help that I was facing it all after a morning in the sun that left me sleepy, so I napped a while and then cleaned like a champ. Albeit a grumpy champ. Things are better, but there's still so far to go. 

I miss the feeling of full cupboards. I miss being able to celebrate a normal day by eating out with friends. I miss snacky foods and foods that are easy to prep . I miss filling the gas tank. I miss feeling "set" and that I've covered all the bases in providing for my little family. 

So apparently I've hit the wall. And maybe, like third trimesters, it's what one needs to transition, in this case to a regular budget. Before this, I didn't want it to end. Now I feel motivated to look for a happy medium for our usual months. It would be lovely to brainstorm with Brian on date night, but grandparents are either out of town or have multiple broken bones. That leaves us with hiring a babysitter, which in the midst of this fabulous idea I call a No Spend month, is not happening. Boo!  

Total spent: 4.29 - gas
Fun money total: 4.04